Here we go again. . .

Some Christians and various other self-appointed defenders of public morality are up in arms at the decision of BBC2 to show Jerry Springer - The Opera on Saturday night. The controversial show, a hit on the stage in the West End for a couple of years now, was transmitted after a week of furore about its alleged profanity: 8,000 swear words, apparently. Although it transpires that this is a fabrication: somebody somewhere had multiplied the number of naughty words by the number of people saying them. Hmmm, very scientific. What has really rubbed some Christians up the wrong way, though, is a scene where Jesus reputedly appears in a nappy and admits to being "a bit gay". Blasphemy apparently, and one group is actually planning to SUE the BBC on this basis. Meanwhile, another "concerned" group of Christians published the phone numbers of BBC executives on the internet, others going so far as to issue death threats to those responsible. Now, I've never studied the bible at great length, but I'm pretty sure Jesus was against that kind of thing.

Speaking of the teachings of Jesus, whatever happened to turning the other cheek? Or, alternatively, if thine TV doth offend thee, change thy fucking channel. I watched the show in question for about ten minutes. I didn't have the slightest idea what was going on and I cared even less. It was a very simple process: I wasn't interested, so I didn't watch it. Yep, a simple process with universal applications.

The whole issue has thrown up a few voices, but by far my favourite quote has been this one by Stephen Green from the Christian Voice prayer group:

"The damage that must have been done to impressionable young people is incalculable."

Ah yes. The voracious appetite of Britain's youth for watching opera late on a Saturday night on BBC2 knows no bounds. The kids of today just can't get enough of satirical musicals. I bet the playgrounds across the land today were abuzz with the talk of nothing else. As if children need introducing to swear words anyway! They are the most foul mouthed creatures on the planet. Observe one lunch break at an average sized school and I bet it would yield more "fucks" and "cunts" than a thousand showings of Jerry Springer - The Opera.

It always astonishes me how the reactions of such a small number of people can be treated so seriously. At its peak, this show attracted 1.8 million viewers, then the next day 900 people call in to complain. 0.05% of the audience! As far as I'm concerned, 8,000 swearwords is NOTHING compared to the deluge of profanity that will pour from my mouth if I ever have to read about religious groups trying to dictate what can and cannot be broadcast on national television again.